I want it that way

Saw this shared on Facebook today... and it is all kinds of wonderful. I couldn't stop smiling, laughing... if I ever had to work...this is the kind of work environment I'm looking for.

Enjoy - HAPPY WEDNSDAY ya'll!

In a FUNK

.... I don't know what my problem is.

I'm in a FUNK.

... which makes me want to sing "play that funky music white boy...."

I don't feel like cleaning out my google reader... it just seems way too time consuming.

I don't feel like reading my book for book club.

I don't feel like meal planning...cooking.

I don't feel like blogging much...

I don't feel like editing videos, organizing photos.

.... I'm sort of blah towards all those things...

Nothing is wrong... it's just weird that all these things that I enjoy... or did enjoy are sort of falling off my radar.

...weird...this funky mood of mine. I'm thinking if I just chill with it... it'll pass. You know... trying to practice patience...with myself.

YOU ARE DUNN

I'm sure you've heard the crazy coming out of the White House. You know, the bit where the White House has declared war on FOX News... for doing unacceptable things like, oh... CHECKING FACTS.

White House Communications Director Anita Dunn... has decided that FOX News is not a real news station because it DARED to check facts. Homie say WHAT? Below are some excerpts from this article.

The White House stopped providing guests to "Fox News Sunday" after host Chris Wallace fact-checked controversial assertions made by Tammy Duckworth, assistant secretary of the Department of Veterans Affairs, in August.

Dunn said fact-checking an administration official was "something I've never seen a Sunday show do."

"She criticized 'Fox News Sunday' last week for fact-checking -- fact-checking -- an administration official," Wallace said Sunday. "They didn't say that our fact-checking was wrong. They just said that we had dared to fact-check."

"Let's fact-check Anita Dunn, because last Sunday she said that Fox ignores Republican scandals, and she specifically mentioned the scandal involving Nevada senator John Ensign," Wallace added. "A number of Fox News shows have run stories about Senator Ensign. Anita Dunn's facts were just plain wrong."

Fox News senior vice president Michael Clemente said: "Surprisingly, the White House continues to declare war on a news organization instead of focusing on the critical issues that Americans are concerned about like jobs, health care and two wars. The door remains open and we welcome a discussion about the facts behind the issues."

Let's not get started with how obnoxious it is to see CRAZY women running around like complete idiots, and let's all thank them for undermining the role of women in the public arena. YOU FOOLS. Let's think about how completely idiotic this administration is, how up it's own rear it is in arrogance... let's think about how they can allow a woman, Dunn who ADMIRES Mao Zedong...and said so to a crowd of high schoolers... is certifiably insane and completely unfit for public office in a democratic United States... she belongs in CHINA for the love of Pete. Let's see how much she loves it after she's had a taste of it shall we?

I am WAITING... WAITING for those that keeled over in spasms of orgasmic delight when Obama was elected. WAITING for someone to condemn this behavior. I am thinking it will not come. That they are too busy mortified... or drunk on his juice to admit any wrong-doing. Have we really fallen that far down the rabbit hole that we don't know which side is UP and which side is DOWN? Come on people... use your own BRAINS!

Any semi-functioning brain... like mine can see that these are more symptoms of an administration that is SICK...diseased... completely and utterly clueless in it's desperate, clawing attempts at all-consuming power.

For a guy that ran for office on the trumpets of rising above the fray, reaching across the aisles and ... hope? Geez... remind me what the return policy on Obama is.

What's good for the gander

Tonight was a Young Women activity night. I left the girls with my hubby expecting them to be asleep or in bed by the time I returned.

Instead I was greeted with two adorable girls running around in just their undies... with giant hugs. I was able to cuddle and tuck them in...it was nice.

Then my husband related how the evening went... and why we should not be popping popcorn at night when the girls are still awake. They follow their nose...and love to snack on popcorn.

Apparently, while I was away our five year old Avant Garde Gal with her three year old sister in tow... barged into our bedroom where my husband, Phantom, was eating popcorn and watching South Park. As soon as they entered the room he paused the TV.

AGG: I want popcorn too. I want to watch that too.
Phantom: You can't watch that.
AGG: Why not?
Phantom: Because it's not good for you.
AGG: It's not good for little kids?
Phantom: Nope.
AGG: Well, if we shouldn't be watching it, then you shouldn't watch it either.
Phantom: You know... you're right. (he stopped watching it... )

...when I was pregnant with her...and had a strong impression that she was my mentor in the pre-existence... she just proved me right.

Feasting

Happy Friday.

This past weekend we were able to feast on the words of our Prophet and apostles. It was a great weekend ... one I hope to carry with me until the April when we get to do it all over again.

These are some pictures from how we enjoyed our conference weekend.



DD loves to flip through books - she actually begged me to read during a few talks. AGG loves to draw. I like to tweet conference. It's like taking electronic notes.

I know you're loving my heart pajamas. My lovely sister gave them to me last year. Yes, I wore those PJs for two full days...they are too soft and comfy to take off.

I made Martha Stewart's Applesauce-Spice Cupcakes with Brown Sugar Cream Cheese Frosting... and yes, it is really that good...and easy peasy.



We went to get Brunch at a local breakfast spot on Saturday...






We also enjoyed family cuddle time.

...there's nothing sweeter or more fulfilling and joyful... than being with my family. I am grateful everyday for these simple pleasures. I am grateful to know that I have a Father in Heaven who loves me with an all-encompassing love. I am grateful for a Savior, Jesus Christ who constantly calls to us, and saves us. I am grateful to Joseph Smith who courageously asked our Father in Heaven what was right. I am grateful to the prophets and people who sacrificed so that I could read, conveniently, from the Book of Mormon, another Testament of Christ. I am grateful to our current Prophet, Thomas S. Monson and our apostles who lovingly lead us, guide us and teach us. I am grateful for the sealing powers of the priesthood and Temple ordinances that allow me to be united eternally with my own little family. I am grateful for the security I have in knowing that motherhood is the right place for me... and that I genuinely love it. It's hard not to feel so blessed ... in light of all these gifts. Dang we are a lucky people.

Have a fabulous weekend... my Hubby and I celebrate our 8th anniversary on the 10/10/09. In Chinese the number 8 is lucky... and 10 is the number of perfection... so I think I'm going to get perfectly lucky on Saturday... *wink, wink*

Kid-trippin

Our five year old has been to Hawaii and Disneyland three times. That's more than half the years she's been alive. Ditto with her sister who is three and has been to Hawaii and Disneyland twice.




I know that most people say, "why take a kid that young, they'll forget it." And... they are right. They will forget it... IF you let them.

My husband has a knack for telling stories. He has the most soothing voice, and is quite skilled at weaving an interesting tale. I'm the go-to gal for reading story books with silly voices. My husband is the one the girls call-on for an off-the-cuff made up story... that's sure to feature themselves on some daring adventure.




Due to his marvelous talent, he tells the stories of our vacations. It helps that he has a photographic memory, just like our oldest who is five. Due to his constant telling/retelling of our actions - the girls remember, in detail what rides we went to at Disneyland, who they rode with... every step of the way. They also remember the food and the beach and the fun they had in the islands of Hawaii. They love it when he pauses to ask what happens next, and they always know the answer... even when I have forgotten.

I've discovered that my girls love nothing more than listening to a story that includes the members of our family. They don't get bored. They can't get enough. And... those memorable family vacations stay present in their minds.


Best advice I could give for those that are kid-trippin... keep it alive... by telling it over-and-over. Plus, what's more fun than family cuddle time, and hearing all about each other?


Yep, this also happens to be homework... check-it.

Imperfect

Today during General Conference, President Henry B. Eyring got up to the pulpit and humbly mentioned that he'd forgotten to release a few of the brethren from their callings. I didn't see any embarrassment, any care of what people thought of him, I saw him just say what needed to be said.

I love that.

I believe we're here to learn - and we make mistakes. I personally like to make light of mistakes and foibles, because I think laughter lightens the mood. I know not everyone is like that. It seems most people are so hung up with trying to appear perfect, trying to appear like they know everything about a specific subject, topic, etc... that they forget - it's okay to not know everything, it's okay to appear human.

I don't think any of us is going to point, or jeer at President Eyring that he forgot earlier in the session to release those brethren. We'll recognize that "hey, one of the Presidency of this Church makes mistakes, perhaps it's okay for me too, and for me to acknowledge it, and then make it right."

Trying to appear perfect, or all-knowing when we're not - does a disservice to us internally, and to those around us. It's not honest.

My favorite phrase is "I don't know" when I'm asked millions of questions from my daughters. But I follow that up with, "let's find out". I think the fact that they know their mother doesn't know everything, is good. I think that when they know we can learn for ourselves, if we don't know something, is great.

I don't know a lot of things, that's why I love to learn. I know I can find an answer if I search for it. It also increases my confidence and my peace of mind knowing that I don't have to know everything. Phew!

The Agenda

With Sheri Dew - third from the left.

At Time Out For Women they asked each of us to have a question in our hearts. I had a lesson to prepare for our YW regarding worthy thoughts, purity... and since that was what I had been pondering in my heart - the material pretty much presented it to me in those two days.

They also asked us to share with someone, what we KNOW...after this conference, or what we've always KNOWN to be true.

I have a lot of other topics I want to write about - but I'll start with what I KNOW.

I wish I could take what I KNOW and toss it into every man, woman and child out there. Because I believe that if we KNOW who we are - we can move mountains.

As children growing up in the LDS Church we are taught who we are. The first songs we learn are "I am a Child of God". It's instilled as soon as we can talk. This simple message is vital to our missions here on this earth. Because we all have a mission. We are here to fulfill those missions. The fact that we're here, in this body demonstrates our support of God and his plan for our salvation. That is powerful to know... to truly understand and KNOW in every fiber of our being.

I didn't always know who I was. In fact, my soul took quite a beating as a child. I often felt out of place. I remember the feeling I had often as a child, standing amidst a crowd of kids, and feeling completely alone, as if I was a cosmic lab rat. That all these crazy experiments, the taunting, the emotional havoc, the physical hurt, was all something conspired to test when I would go crazy. It was in those moments that I called out to God. That I asked him to rescue me from my predicament. I wasn't rescued in the way I wanted, but my faith was always strengthened. It would have been so easy, so incredibly easy for me to take the path into an unhealthy, unstable lifestyle, I'd have all the excuses I needed to go down that dark, and twisty path, but I didn't, because the Lord increased my faith. I learned at a young age, that He walks beside me.

I discovered early on that if I wanted to become like the people I admired, the ones with faith, with joy, with generosity, that I could become like them, by working hard on myself. That I could make myself the person I would want to be, with the Lord's help. I haven't always been outgoing, or warm. I think if you were to look back at my childhood - you'd find a girl who hid in bathrooms, was scared and awkwardly alone. I used to be the one who would wait to have someone, anyone come say hi to her. That's not me now. Because I didn't like sitting the on the sidelines. I chose to be the person I wanted to be. My Savior gave me the strength to do so.

I found examples, good and bad that I could learn from. I found a co-worker who didn't know who she was without a career - I knew I wanted to know who I was without anyone or anything to distract from who I was at the core.

Just recently I have started to learn the joy of finding out what it means to be loved unconditionally by my Father in Heaven. I've discovered that with my Savior there are no strings attached. He loves me no matter what choices I've made, what mistakes I've made... He loves me, right now, just as I am. Some of you have already learned this ... reflected in those who've raised you - that's miraculous. Discovering it now... has expanded my soul...joyfully. It's such a strange way for me to think and feel - to know that I am lovable, without having to follow any set path, rules, guide, or expectation... it's indescribable.

There are still lessons I'm learning, things I'm constantly struggling with, working on, because I'm not yet the person I want to be. I don't know if I'll ever be that person completely, here on this earth, but I know I can work at it each day.

I think about how, there have been challenges I've lived through, and still am working through... and I think about the way my life is now. If you asked any of my old friends from college, and even some of the boys I dated... I don't think they would have thought of motherhood as a natural fit for me. I certainly would not have imagined that 10+ years after graduating BYU I'd be as centered and happy as a mother, as I am now. In fact, if you had told me I would love to bake and cook, and read cookbooks for enjoyment, own a sewing machine... and actually sew semi-straight lines... I'd probably ask if you were smoking crack. I've only just begun doing these things... in the last five years.

If you had told me that going back to a career is totally unappetizing to me now... I'd try to talk some sense into you. I've discovered that loving the role I have as a wife and Mother is a blessing. It's a blessing because so many women, so many blogs, so many talks from our leaders try to convince a multitude of women that their highest role, their greatest gift to humanity, is to be a Mother. I don't have to be persuaded - I know it. I KNOW it. I OWN it. I genuinely raise my hand to the bar and shout AMEN!

Of course... I wish this knowledge came with a cliffs note manual so I wouldn't be so awful at it... I make mistakes... daily... every minute. I find myself apologizing, on my knees asking to help me to be more patient... but in return I'm blessed with the feeling of fulfillment in this role. I know that this season with my little ones is short... too, too short. I can feel it slipping through my fingers like sand every moment and my heart aches, my mind worries... I still have so much to learn and do for these precious girls.

I haven't always kept my eye on the Savior... there are times I slip. But I have testimony of what Sheri Dew stated so eloquently at the TOFW conference, "When we focus on the world we don't see the Adversary or the Savior. When we focus on the Savior we love Him, we see Him and the effects of the Adversary."

When I think of all the things of the world that ail women who happen to also be mothers... the list is endless. From their body image, their need to compare, shopping labels, cliques, wanting it all, an extra job, or owning your own business (when you don't need it), reputation, degrees, titles... there's so many, and they are so varied. If we aren't centered in who we are, we focus too much on what we think others think of us... we forget that others don't matter. We forget that GOD loves us. We forget that all this superficial dressing, superfluous activities and wants... don't matter. We forget that what matters are the lives we influence. Because when we focus on the world - we are influenced by the world. When we focus on God - we influence the ones who are most important.

Sheri Dew told us that there are three things we MUST KNOW.
1. KNOW who you are - I Am a Child of God.
2. KNOW the POWER of the ATONEMENT
3. KNOW how to Receive Personal Revelation

1. Dew stated that there are two things nearly ALL Prophets teach. First, they testify of Christ - they witness His divinity, and two they preach of US. From Adam and Eve down to this dispensation of the fullness of times - they preach of US. Dew asked "do you think the Lord would take a chance on men and women He couldn't count on? No way." I am here for a purpose. You are here for a purpose. We are a generation different from all others. Ours is the only dispensation that will NOT end in apostasy.

Imagine that. We will always have the priesthood. We will always have temple ordinances. We will always have Prophet who will lead and guide us. The magnitude of that kind of miracle... that we participate in is heavy. It is powerful. We owe it to those that came before to fulfill our missions. To FOCUS on the Savior, to stop our self-pity and constant comparisons with our neighbors. We need to do remember who we are. We may feel inadequate at times, but the Spirit testifies to each of our souls of our power. We are the noble and great ones. Will we live up to that?

2. Dew stated that Christ came with a doctrine of healing. He came to heal us from our heartache, sin, emotional weakness, physical weakness, mental weakness, depression, sorrow, loneliness... everything that makes us feel small, or insignificant. It is vital to our mission to understand the healing power the Atonement.

3. We need to learn the language of revelation. Dew said that we need to learn what it feels like, what it sounds like. That we need to work at it. She said that way the Lord speaks to her has changed over the years. Yet, she is still working to learn, because sometimes she gets it, and sometimes she doesn't. He wants to talk to us, we need to learn to hear it.

Dew also stated, nothing surprises our Heavenly Father. In '98 President Hinckley prophesied about economic collapse. Look at us now. Heavenly Father knew when the world would start to fall apart, and He wanted YOU and me. We weren't placed here accidentally.

We have been sent here to DO.

As a woman I see that my role in this season is to influence for good. Whether that be my most precious daughters, the friends and people I interact with on a daily, or less frequent basis - I have a job to do. I am not craving any other "seemingly more sparkly" position, or one that I, in my small perspective of eternity, deems more important. I already have my call from the Lord. I know who I am. I know God will strengthen me to fulfill my mission joyfully.

When I go through my day I need to remind myself by asking "Who's agenda is this supporting? Christ or the Adversary?"

I KNOW. I know that I am a Child of God. That's just what I know.

With Jenny Oaks Baker, second from the left

Make-up Work

It's incredibly, embarrassingly, late.

...let's face it... there are other more important things in real life I am enjoying.

So...let's get to the HOMEWORK it so I can get back to la vida.

~Think about an old person you love or admire. Write a detailed description of the character and experience reflected in their face. Use a thesaurus if necessary to find the most precise words. (Ideas: conviction, spunk, wit.) What do you hope to look like when you're old?

I love President and Sister Hinckley. They were both incredibly faithful, determined and hard-working. I loved their sense of humor, their raw humanity. I love reading Sister Hinckley's letters to her children, her grandchildren and her husband. Reading her thoughts confirm what I believe - genuine women are real. They have spunk, they have great days, they have bad days, they get riled up when one of their own children are messed with. They are courageous and steadfast. I love the intelligence they both shared, as well as their real-world wisdom. I adored their humor, their ability to poke fun at themselves, and not take themselves seriously.

You always knew exactly where you stood with the Hinckleys. I don't think they minced words. I love their frankness, done with love. I love their honesty, sincerity... they ROCK.

They were two petite little people, who were giants in my eyes of what I would like to be. I admired that because they were united, they grew to look like one another. I hope to be like that. Sister Hinckley and President Hinckley had these naturally aged faces full of JOY. I don't want the plasticized, over-glopped mask that so many opt for... I want to simply radiate JOY. With any luck... I may just get my wish.


~Blog about something you never leave home without. Prompt: "I never go anywhere without double-stick tape. I use it for _________.

My iPhone, or any cell phone. Can't leave home without it. I'm a big... in case x happens, I need to be able to call for help. I've accidentally been driven into "ghetto" areas by my hubby...not a peaceful, stress-less experience, cell phone is important... also navigation so you don't accidentally get caught in a seedy neighborhood.


~Do you remember a special book from your childhood? Who read it to you?

There was this book my Mom read to us kids when we were in elementary school. She read it in Chinese - so I can't remember the title... but it was about a boy... who dealt with some tragic things in his life. I can't remember details, but I remember how I felt. I remember crying listening to the story, I remember holding my breath waiting to find out what would happen next. I remember how the words my Mom read could transport me into the story. That's why I love to read... it's why it makes my heart happy that my children love it when I read to them.


~Come up with ten words that describe you and your image. Ideas: current, attractive, confident, casual, unique, elegant. Look your words up in the dictionary and let the definitions inspire you. Write a Personal Style Statement such as, "I project a sophisticated, unique presence," or I present an image of confidence, elegance and quality."

Ten words... that is going to be a stretch - but here goes (I guess it could also be what I want to be)
1. Honest
2. Quirky
3. Sincere
4. Thoughtful
5. Loyal
6. Determined
7. Intelligent
8. Centered
9. Funny
10. Confident

I present an image of a woman who knows who she is, and where her power comes from.


~List 8 ways you've surprised yourself lately. Ideas: "I'm a better cook than my mother-in-law." "I was too nervous to get out of the car."

1. I prefer being a mother to being a career woman.
2. Anyone can cook.
3. There are few women who really know who they are - it's a little unsettling.
4. My kids teach me more than I teach them.
5. We're not as smart as we think...that's why I like to keep learning.
6. I don't care what anyone else, outside my circle - (God, hubby, kids) thinks of me.
7. I never wear make-up unless it's for Church or some outing. Even then it's minimal.
8. I can learn almost anything I put my heart into.


~What books or movies about World War II would you recommend?
1. Saving Private Ryan
2. Band of Brothers
3. Schindler's List
4. Life is Beautiful


~Write about a tradition that has influenced your life in a positive way. Idea: "Our family always had family prayer before we opened the Christmas presents; my mom always wrote a letter to us on our birthdays; my grandpa always told us he loved us at Thanksgiving Dinner."

One tradition from my family is the family good night prayer. We do this every night on our knees, holding hands in a circle. We pray for each member of the family. It's great fun hearing the girls pray for each member of the family when it's their turn. I prefer traditions centered on faith than superfluous materialistic traditions.


~Write a thank-you letter to someone who has inspired you.
Did this without even realizing it... so awesome to check this off the list. If you wanted to know - it was for a friend of mine who bore a sweet testimony.

I'm also looking for a Laurel Teacher I had in YW - Valerie Hauber. Thought I'd throw it out there. She is by far my favorite YW leader of all time. She inspired me through her grace, elegance and her lessons. I still have every handout she made for us young women. If I never find her, I hope she knows how grateful I am for her influence on me.


~Write a line from a song or poem that speaks to you. Explain why.
Idea: "Doodely-do-do-do. The steel strings caught my attention over the raucous giggling in the back seat. I was chauffeuring the kids along the old Wasatch Boulevard to visit Mom when I first heard Paul Simon sing 'I'm a poor boy, empty as a pocket, empty as a pocket with nothing to lose.' I could relate. We had just come home from a year in England empty as a pocket with nothing to lose . . . "

I am horrible at memorizing lines of songs... I always sing the wrong words...and usually on repeat.... so I'll leave it at Phil 4:13 "I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me." I've found in my life - that as long as those things are righteous... He always, always gives me that strength. One of my great roommates introduced me to that verse. I have tried to locate her to thank her for that in my life - and haven't been able to find her either... perhaps you can help me, Holly Gillaland Hodgson.

About Boys

On the car ride home from kindergarten today... boy names have been changed.

QS: Did you have a happy day?

AGG: Yes.

QS: What did you do?

AGG: I don't play with Charlie anymore. He doesn't play nice games. I don't like him anymore.

QS: Okay. Who do you play with?

AGG: I play with Jimmy.

QS: Is he nice?

AGG: Yes, I told him we shouldn't play the bad games and should play the good games, so he came and played with me.

QS: That's great!

AGG: Mommy, did you know there's a girl who likes all the boys?

QS: Nope. Who is she?

AGG: Me.

QS: Oh, why?

AGG: Because boys are handsome.

QS: Why are they handsome?

AGG: They're handsome because they're boys!

QS: You know you can play with the girls too, right?

AGG: Yes, but I like playing with the boys, boys are soooo handsome!

THREE

...uh, huh.

Dauntless Daughter is THREE today.

Adorable...

She is dealing with a bit of the cold. But we'll try to make it awesome, thrilling and as fun as possible. She is our determined, fierce, humorous, cuddly little princess. She is our sassafras, who knows her mind and has never been afraid to demonstrate her own opinions. She's also a momma's girl.

Last night, after we'd read books and prayed - she begged one more book at 10pm.

DD: Can you read me one more book? (places it in my lap)
QS: Sweetie, I'll read it tomorrow, right now it's late, and if you don't go to sleep your birthday won't come.
DD: Oh, my birthday. How about just one page?

She has the most unique way of winding down, taking a break, or just needing some attention. She sucks her left thumb, grabs her bibi (blankie) in the middle of the bibi with her right hand and twists the bibi around and around. The entire time her arm is stuck up high towards the ceiling. It is hilarious.

I need to go make some snickerdoodles for her.

SHE IS FUN.

HAPPY, HAPPY BIRTHDAY My Beautiful Daughter
I
LOVE
YOU
FOREVER,
No
MATTER
WHAT,
JUST
AS
YOU
ARE,
ALWAYS.
Love,
Momma

Boy Crazy

....and I have only myself to blame.

You know that curse every mother puts on her kids when they are young? The one where "one day you'll have a child JUST like you?"

Well, apparently it really works.

Dauntless Daughter and Avant Garde Gal

I was at a volunteer meeting for Avant Garde Gal's kindergarten class. I had both of my girls with me, as did a few other parents with kids. All the kids were quietly coloring and I was relieved... until towards the end of the meeting my daughter and her little sister Dauntless Daughter started having words with this boy from her class. I'm going to call him Charlie (from Charlie and Lola).

DD: Don't be mean to my sister.
AGG: Yeah, I don't like you anymore.
Charlie: Then I don't like you.
AGG: But I like you. You don't like me.
Charlie: Yes I do.
AGG: No, you said you don't think I like you, but I do. So I don't like you.
Charlie: *stunned silence*

I was utterly confused.

QS: Mrs. FANTASTIC teacher, is this normal?
Teacher: No, but apparently AGG has a huge crush on Charlie.
QS: She does?
Teacher: yeah, I'm surprised you didn't know, she talks about him all the time in class.
QS: She's mentioned him a few times, but I had no idea it was a full-blown crush.
Teacher: It was so funny the other day, the other teacher and I nearly died when AGG went up to the other teacher, started rubbing her arm and said sweetly, "Charlie is so handsome."
QS: Oh great, she's not even a teenager yet.

I suppose I only have myself to blame. If you go through my elementary journals... it's just lists of boys... who I thought was cute. I still remember my second grade crush...he looked like Peter Brady with dumbo ears... his name was Dusty.

Then when I went to pick up my little Dauntless Daughter from preschool, her teacher told me that DD had a great day.

Teacher: DD had a wonderful day today.
QS: She did? That's awesome.
Teacher: She's taken a page out of her big sister's book.
QS: Really? What?
Teacher: She has a Prince.
QS: A what?
Teacher: She and Trevor (not his real name) pretended to be each other's Prince and Princess. They played together all day, sat next to each other, it was really cute.
QS: She's not even three yet, oh my!


So... I guess my husband has his hands full. I can't even find a way to blame this one on him. And I'm usually pretty good about finding a way to blame it on him.

FIVE

Yep....

Avant Garde Gal is FIVE years old today.


Stunning...

I'm busy making this day especially special for her... because she has looked forward to it all year. She is a bundle of joy, creativity, sensitivity, intelligence... she is our little prolific pixie.

I have much, much more to say and show... but for now... I'm going to go hang out with this amazing eldest daughter of mine who has helped me grow, and expanded my ability to love unconditionally.

SHE ROCKS.

HAPPY, HAPPY BIRTHDAY My Beautiful Daughter
I
LOVE
YOU
FOREVER,
No
MATTER
WHAT,
JUST
AS
YOU
ARE,
ALWAYS.
Love,
Momma

Epiphanies

Leah, Kim, SHERI DEW, Queen Scarlett, Shannon, Suzie

This past Fri/Sat I had the pleasure of going to Time Out for Women.

My friend Suzie organized a small group... I've found she is one of a handful of women I am lucky to be living around... that the more I spend time with them, the more I love them. I love women who inspire me, who I admire, and who are genuine. I am very, very blessed.

We celebrated my friend, Kim's birthday on Saturday, who is of that select handful of women that I admire.

I have so much to think about...and so much more to write down. But these past few weeks I've been limiting my Internet time so I can get to the business of living...and learning to be more organized with both kids in school, a large amount of volunteering - and finding a balance with my YW calling...and my more important calling as mother and wife.

So for now... a few thoughts that when spoken at the TOFW conference made my soul expand and jump for joy at the truth that resonated inside my heart.

"Obedience is NOT perfection." (Sheri Dew or Wendy Watson Nelson)

Elder Jeffrey R. Holland (quoted by Sheri Dew): “Sometimes we act as though we’re going to stay here on this earth, when we aren’t, we can’t and we won’t.”

“When we focus on the world we don’t see the adversary or the Savior. When we FOCUS on the Savior we love and see Him, and we’re able to see the effects of the adversary and safeguard against him.” - Sheri Dew

Kris Belcher - in response to people telling her "Heavenly Father doesn't give us anything we can't handle" when she had a second bout of cancer that removed the sight of her second eye. Belcher said, "Of course we're given things we can't handle, why else would we have a Savior?"

Kim Nelson - "Be kind to yourself... treat yourself as you would your daughter, or someone else's daughter. Because you are a daughter of God."

"Never Even Once." - Wendy Watson Nelson

Never Even Once will I... take a sip of alcohol, smoke, drink caffeine, wear skimpy clothing, compare myself to others, etc....

Never Even Once will I forget... to get on my knees and pray, turn to the Savior to heal me, remember that He loves me as I am, to hug my children, adore my husband, be gentle to myself, etc...

ps. I was frantically scribbling notes through the two days... so the words may not be precise, but the meaning is there

Refreshing

This summer has been great for me and the girls.

I'd hit the gym for two hours, get them out of the gym play center, head into the locker room where our suits, sunscreen and lunch was stored...get changed, lathered up with spf and head on out to the pool for two hours of lunch and swimming.

Towards the end of this blissful summer routine ... we headed into the lockerroom to get ready to go to the pool as usual. The girls and I headed towards the corner where I kept all our stuff... and ran smack dab into...the back side of a larger woman who was proabably 60-75 years old sitting on a the bench with only a bra on. Luckily for us, it was the back of her.

Her derriere was spilling onto the bench. I immediately had these thoughts. Please, don't let the girls say anything. Of course they're going to say something. Holy H---, how am I going to handle this?

AGG: (as loud as can be possible) Mommy! WHY IS HER BUM SO BIG?

QS: (to the lady with bum) I am so sorry!

AGG: MOMMY IT IS SO BIG and FLOPPY! WHY IS IT SO BIG AND FLOPPY? (giggle)

DD: YEAH, IT'S A BIG BUM BUM (giggle)

QS: I am so sorry... I ...

Lady with BUM: No, no no... it's fine. It's actually refreshing.

QS:(mortified, but relieved) Thank you.

... I will remember to use that exact phrase when I'm sitting there one day with my bum spilling over. Refreshing... yes, yes it was.

Blog Homework #8

Books Read Long Ago Which It's Now Time To Reread

1. A Wrinkle in Time
2. Where the Red Fern Grows
3. The Boxcar Children
4. Anne of Green Gables
5. Rebecca

You can't catch me...

...I'm the Gingerbread Man.

Guess which one is Avant Garde Gal's. It was not hard. It's also... AWESOME.

At back-to-school night we (Phantom, my hubby, and I) saw this collage of gingerbread men.

P (whispers while the teachers are talking to us): Look (points).
QS: What?
P: The gingerbread men.
QS: Cute.
P: Guess which one is AGG's.
QS: Oh my gosh - that one?
P: I guarantee you it's that one.

After the presentation we went over and sure enough, right on the leg was our creative daughter's name. She is an original.

We talked to her teacher about it and she laughed. She said a few of the girls had asked if they could put bows on their heads - but the teachers asked them where bowties go. Despite that, AGG still put it on it's head. I love it.

Also...I need to get a picture of this - they have a board with the kids' pictures, a hand print and then a picture the kids drew. Our daughter, has her dressed up as a princess, getting married in the temple. AGG is constantly drawing, imagining, acting... her energy level is stunning.

Blog Homework #7

~ Someone found your blog and emailed you saying they're visiting the city where you grew up. Write an itinerary for a one-day tour of your hometown. Prompt: "When you're there, you can't miss____. There's a great view from____. My favorite place for lunch is_____, and the kids would love____."

Hawaiian Style

September 2008, Maui

Having moved a lot as a kid... I don't really feel like I have a hometown. Perhaps that's why as a parent now, I hope to stay put for a bit so my kids can lay down roots. However, if my hubby ever gets a job overseas...we're outta here.

So... the closest to a hometown for me is either Oahu's North Shore or Kapalua, on Maui. For heaven sakes, my daughters' names are Hawaiian... I belong there - or so I tell my husband.

North Shore, Oahu
We like to stay in the condos in Kuilima. Traveling with kids, even on our own we prefer to have a kitchen, washer/dryer and the simple amenities of home, and space. Hotel rooms just feel cramped and not quite as homey. We always find great rates on www.vrbo.com

One of our favorite eats is Macky's Shrimp Truck. They used to hang out near Turtle Bay resort... but they've since moved locations. You can't leave Oahu without trying one of Macky's perfect shrimp lunches. The shrimp, the kahuku corn...and the fresh papayas, pineapples, mangos and lychee they sell. Oh my gosh I need to go "home" right now! We always end up going multiple times...They are wicked, good. They always seem to win the annual Shrimp Truck cooking contests. My mouth is salivating just thinking about it.

The other favorite, must stop, each time we're hitting the North Shore is Haleiwa Joe's. I am a sucker for all things seafood, and pulled pork. You can find such perfect pulled pork and fresh fish here. You'll also need to take a stroll through Haleiwa - it's a cute, surfer town - you can rent jet skis and other water equipment. You'll find you're all of a sudden in the midst of gorgeous sea turtles.

Kuilima is situated right near the Turtle Bay resort. So you have access to their great restaurants and the easy access beach. In fact we've really enjoyed Lei Lei's Bar and Grill off the golf course. It serves great food in a casual atmosphere, and the kids like it too. We've also eaten at their grill right off the beach - you can't beat food in Hawaii. Everything just tastes better, sharper, fresher... it could be the healing powers of the ocean air.

If you're in the North Shore you have to go to the Polynesian Cultural Center. We've been each time we've been to Oahu... because you simply can't find a better show anywhere in the islands. The PCC is also a great place to take kids. They've created villages for each of the islands, showcasing culture, crafts, customs, dance, unique to each group. I love doing any souvenir shopping there, because everything you spend at the PCC goes back to the students who work there, towards education.

Right next door to the PCC is the Laie Hawaii Temple where my husband proposed to me. We took our girls with us a couple years ago to show them the exact spot where my hunny sang me a song...and got on one knee, to my utter shock and joy.

Hanauma Bay is a fun manmade area to snorkel. The fish swarm right at the beach access around your ankles. There's also toilet bowl there as well. And you know that one of my all-time favorite shows LOST is filmed there. If you've seen 50 First Dates you'll find that Sea Life Park was the little place Adam Sandler's character worked. It's also where you can have a dolphin experience. We did do that, and it was fantastic. We love dolphins.

We've also found that Roy's on Oahu is better than the other locations on the mainland and elsewhere in the islands.

Our travels center around beach time and food. When we think vacation, we think relaxing ...and indulging. We've been enough times that we just don't buy souvenirs anymore.

October 2007, Oahu

Kapalua, Maui
We discovered Kapalua when we honeymooned here. We love this area because it's a bit more secluded than the rest of the island, but close enough to Lahaina. We like to stay in the Pineapple Hills area. You can find great deals again, on www.vrbo.com

The Plantation Course in Kapalua is of the PGA tour. Also on site are Sansei - a MUST for great seafood, Japanese food. Their butterfish in sweet miso sauce... well, I ended up ordering more than one - is melt in your mouth goodness. Everything there is perfection.

Just a few doors down from Sansei is the Honolua Store on the property. It's a general store that also sells the famous mixed plate. If you're looking to try, and you must, the mixed plate - this is the place to do it. Their menu changes daily, and the portions are large, and tasty. The mixed plate comes from the multi-ethnic diversity of Hawaii's people.

If you're looking for something upscale and gussied up, the Lahaina Grill is perfect. You don't expect a place of this caliber to cater to children - but they do. This is why I love the islands. You can treat yourself to a place like this - and they are totally chillin' with the children. Of course the food - mouth-watering.

I should mention that we loved taking our girls to the Maui Ocean Center. It's a small aquarium compared to the Monterey Bay Aquarium - but it is so worth it to take a gander through the center. I can't remember the name of the grill there - but there's a great grill-like restaurant right near the Ocean Center - eat there. The view is lovely, and the mahi mahi is so fresh. There's also a cute ice cream shop too - it has some delicious flavors, and treats to take home.

May 2006, Oahu
...had to go before I gave birth in Sept. we're a family of four...one of us is just surrounded by amniotic fluid.

As for when we travel - we like to hit the islands in September or October. The weather is perfect - it's also nice because it's not the onslaught of summer vacationers... and you start off your own winter energized. It's the off-season, which gets you the great deals - and usually airfare is a bit cheaper. We like flying Hawaiian for their aloha spirit, the miles and the deals.

... I'm hoping one day - I'll be calling Hawaii my hometown...and all those folks who think I'm native... will be right.

Aloha!

Blog Homework #6

~Write a paragraph about a job you would do for free. Prompt: "If money were no object, I'd like to be a ______, and work in_______."

For Hire

There are very few things I want to do on my own. I don't mind being on my own. But I love sharing experiences with my husband and my daughters. I can't help it. It's almost like Lehi's dream. Once he tasted the fruit of the tree he couldn't wait to share it with the ones he loved most.

So if money were no object...I would love to travel the world with my family on an educational journey of history, art, culture, food... and write about it.

That's it.

Now, who wants to pay me for it?

Blog Homework #5

it's #5 because #4 was private.

~Search through the drawer in your heart. Are there memories that shaped your self image? Write about a time when your feelings were hurt. Why do you think you still remember the incident? How does that help you understand yourself better?

Take a look inside... careful, it's spooky, but it's real

I thought this assignment would be easy. I mean I've written a lot about the trials, lessons, hurts I've experienced from schoolmates, and such... I kept thinking, that if I wrote about those same things, that I'd be cheating. I'd be plagiarizing myself.

Then it hit me.

I knew what I should write.

But how? It still hurts.

I'd been preparing a YW lesson and was combing through my old journals.

I've often wondered why I've stayed strong to my faith, even at a young age, even when things at home were terrifying.

When I started reading through my own words I realized that I survived because at a young age I discovered that though unconditional love and acceptance weren't part of my family life, that God always loved me... even though.

God loved me even though I accidentally broke a ceiling light playing with my brothers. God loved me even though my brothers, thinking it was funny, purposely broke one. God loved me even though I was punished for my mistake, and then again because I was somehow responsible for the actions of my younger siblings. I was in elementary school. I knew God felt I was more important than a ceiling light.

Being betrayed at a young age made me realize that there wasn't anyone I could depend on. If the people closest to you can destroy your self-image and hurt you emotionally and physically, then who can you depend on? This affected my dating life. Even though I was dating someone, I still didn't trust I was good enough. I couldn't figure out why they would want to date me. I though it was a joke. My mind was sick. Thank heavens I met my husband. He made me feel accepted, just as I was, even though. Also, I think I was blessed with faith to stick through all that craziness.

I had the kind of faith that when people who are supposed to love unconditionally, and provide that safe haven, tell you how selfish, ungrateful, unworthy, evil... and then physically take out their anger on you... the faith that God loved me even though I didn't feel lovable right then.

It is because of that faith that I am where I am today. It would have been easier to become self-destructive and lead a life much more unhealthy than I live today, but I didn't. I didn't because of that faith. Faith stronger than familial relationships. Faith more hopeful than depressing situations. I've realized that with Faith I am stronger.

I have faith that God will help me through this. That He will help me heal. It's taken me 31 years to face the realities of my youth. So the scars are still raw. It's hard admitting an imperfect childhood, when all you ever wanted was a perfect Norman Rockwell like one, and when you're surrounded by what you think are perfect, lovable, giant Mormon family reunions.

Because of my childhood I am adamant not to do those things that I knew hurt me. I still remember how it all felt and I am grateful that I don't have a desire to do those things that made me despair at times.

I know I am not perfect. I'm pretty messed up. But I'm willing to reveal my weaknesses to allow the Lord to strengthen me. I have faith that if I turn my issues over to Him, he will make me something glorious. Isn't that why we're here?

Mommy, WOW! I'm a big kid now.

My little Dauntless Daughter has been clamoring for a year now to go to school. She is attending the same preschool her sister did. Last year when we had to drop her big sis at school, it was like pulling teeth to get DD back in the car to go home. She would throw a loud, angry, crying fit, and try to make it impossible for me to buckle that 5-part harness for her car seat. Then, the enjoyable 7-10 min ride home, with her screaming bloody murder the entire way.

Yeah, I think she was a little ticked I didn't leave her at school with her sister.

So this year, before school we let her pick out a lunchbox and a back pack. Both of which are Kai-Lan. She picked out her first day of school outfit and could not wait.

In fact, there's about a 40 min lag-time between when we drop off her big sis at Kindergarten and her start of preschool. During that time she kept forcefully stating, "I want to go to preschool RIGHT now!"

When we got there her excitement seemed to come down a few notches. Phantom left work to see her off on her first day. When her Daddy showed up he noticed her mood.

P: DD are you excited or nervous?
DD: Um, I'm a little bit nervous.

When she realized it was actually happening, I think the reality of being away from us hit her. She did cling a bit... she was nervously adorable.

I'll admit... I was sad to let her go.



At the end of the day with Avant Garde Gal in tow, we went to pick up DD. We were there a little early, just the tail end of their snack time. DD saw us peeking through the window in the door and immediately her face broke into a HUGE grin. She ran over to open the door for us. It was magical to see her own her space and excited to show us how proud she was.

Radiating Divine Nature

You are divine.

You are a daughter of your Heavenly Father, who loves you.

He knows what you can become through Faith in Him.

Accept who you are.

You are unique. You are beautiful in God's eyes. You are His creation.

How do we forget all that?
How do we rationalize that away?
How do we justify our disbelief?
How do we lose our faith in Him?
How do we lose who we really are?

"You can’t live your life worrying that the world is staring at you. When you let people’s opinions make you self-conscious you give away your power. … The key to feeling [confident] is to always listen to your inner self—[the real you.]” And in the kingdom of God, the real you is “more precious than rubies.”

"Every young woman is a child of destiny and every adult woman a powerful force for good. I mention adult women because, sisters, you are our greatest examples and resource for these young women. And if you are obsessing over being a size 2, you won’t be very surprised when your daughter or the Mia Maid in your class does the same and makes herself physically ill trying to accomplish it. We should all be as fit as we can be—that’s good Word of Wisdom doctrine. That means eating right and exercising and helping our bodies function at their optimum strength. We could probably all do better in that regard. But I speak here of optimum health; there is no universal optimum size."

"Frankly, the world has been brutal with you in this regard. You are bombarded in movies, television, fashion magazines, and advertisements with the message that looks are everything! The pitch is, “If your looks are good enough, your life will be glamorous and you will be happy and popular.” That kind of pressure is immense in the teenage years, to say nothing of later womanhood. In too many cases too much is being done to the human body to meet just such a fictional (to say nothing of superficial) standard. As one Hollywood actress is reported to have said recently: “We’ve become obsessed with beauty and the fountain of youth. … I’m really saddened by the way women mutilate [themselves] in search of that. I see women [including young women] … pulling this up and tucking that back. It’s like a slippery slope. [You can’t get off of it.] … It’s really insane … what society is doing to women.”

"In terms of preoccupation with self and a fixation on the physical, this is more than social insanity; it is spiritually destructive, and it accounts for much of the unhappiness women, including young women, face in the modern world. And if adults are preoccupied with appearance—tucking and nipping and implanting and remodeling everything that can be remodeled—those pressures and anxieties will certainly seep through to children. At some point the problem becomes what the Book of Mormon called “vain imaginations.” And in secular society both vanity and imagination run wild. One would truly need a great and spacious makeup kit to compete with beauty as portrayed in media all around us. Yet at the end of the day there would still be those “in the attitude of mocking and pointing their fingers” as Lehi saw, because however much one tries in the world of glamour and fashion, it will never be glamorous enough." (Elder Jeffrey R. Holland, Ensign Nov 2005)

The most beautiful women I know are natural. They are unique. They are imperfect. Sometimes when women are so obsessed with what's on the outside they forget to work on the inside... and that is not beautiful. No amount of covering will make it so.

Ultimately this outward desire for beauty isn't about one person. We each affect others for good or ill. Young ladies watch us. They learn what is "normal" from us. They learn whether or not they can accept who they are...through us. We don't have a choice in the matter - they watch - what sacrifices are we willing to make so that they can have a better story to tell?

One of my favorite children's books is a Cuban folktale - retold by Carmen Agra Deedy. In the story, Martina, the Beautiful Cockroach meets a few different suitors. Each suitor asks Martina the same question, "Martina Josefina Catalina Cucaracha, beautiful muchacha, won't you be wife?" The last suitor... a little mouse named Perez is her soul mate. I love their dialog:

"Hola, hello." His voice was like warm honey. "My name is Perez."

"Hola," she whispered shyly, "I'm Martina--"

"--the beautiful cockroach," he finished for her.

"You think I'm beautiful?"

The little mouse turned pink under his fur. "Well, my eyes are rather weak, but I have excellent EARS. I know you are strong and good, Martina Josefina Catalina Cucaracha." Then he squinted sweetly, "Who cares if you are beautiful?"

"Who cares if you are beautiful?" - if you have what is most important? We should maybe, obsess a little more about what is going on inside us, seek to cure it, improve it, or maintain it...rather than lust after a skewed view of "beauty".

Together we can let that divine nature... radiate through all our sisters.

(the blog homework tonight is private... this post was inspired by the positive nature of it...because when we focus on the negative we undergo frivolous operations.)

Blog Homework #3

Homework: Pick one or the other, or be inspired. ~Read something on your book shelf for sheer pleasure. ~Blog about a book you've read over and over. Prompt: "I can rifle the pages of ____and easily find my favorite part about____."

How do you blog about a book you've read over and over? How?

Growing up I longed to step into the pages where Watch was the lovable companion to Henry, Jessie, Violet and Benny. To join them in their carefree life in an old boxcar. I remember the joy to find that the "cruel" Grandfather they had imagined was really a kind man who would take care of my friends.

I remember wanting to run around on the prairies with Laura. I'd join her as the rotten Nellie always tried to put the Ingalls' down. I always wanted in a confrontation just to rough up Nellie a bit.

I felt Anne's heartache trying to fit in (CARROTS!!!), finding a bosom friend, and falling in love with the dreamy Gilbert. I discovered my own ideals of love young. I couldn't read fast enough of the Bronte sisters, Jane Eyre, Rebecca and my trusted friend Ms. Jane Austen. There was something so beautiful about a time when there were rules of decorum during courting. That there could be a man such as Mr. Darcy. That a book could let me pretend I was Miss. Elizabeth Bennet. For those of you Austen addicts - you must read Austenland. MUST. Shannon Hale is magnificent. I have no idea how she wrote an entire book about me, without my knowledge.

Oh Aslan... I can't remember how many times I've read the Chronicles of Narnia. I feel like I'm the fifth escapee through the wardrobe with Peter, Susan, Edmund and Lucy. I read something recently that said we should read the Chronicles of Narnia at least three times in our lifetime; in our youth, in our middle ages, and finally, in the twilight of our life. Each phase we go though brings new meaning, new insight and life experience. I have loved sharing these books I adore with my own daughters.

I love beautiful imagery, rich meaning and old-world mystery. Keturah and Lord Death by Martine Leavitt is a recent find that I have been rereading quite often. It's a young adult novel, and while I am no young adult... except in my mind, it is a revelation. The language is rich and inviting, the story is moving and profound. It's one I will continue to reread and can't wait for my girls to discover.

For those of you who know me... you know I'm all about the food. While I've never been interested in visiting the land of my forefathers, it took Nicole Mones' The Last Chinese Chef to get me excited about traveling to China one day. The story is a mature love story. The food described within these pages is nothing short of miraculous. As an American-born Chinese gal (ABC) I had grown up with many customs that I just never realized as customs...and to discover that there's a whole world of people like me, is startling and comforting. I love books like this - that teach me, sustain me and bring me peace.

There is nothing quite like losing yourself in the throes of an author's words, in new worlds, and among familiar friends. Reading good books is something that can change you, bring you joy, and it is a gift to share that love of stories, with those you love most.

I hope my daughters grow up with fond memories of the books we read together, and the ones they will devour late at night, under the covers, by flashlight.

shhhh...I'm reading, and visiting with kindred spirits.

Post script: I also loved A Wrinkle in Time. I read it over and over in my youth - time to reread it again now that I am... sort of grown-up.

Blog Homework #2

~Fantasize about arriving at your dream destination. Prompt: "I looked out the window of the taxi and saw the . . ."

Will Travel For Food

Scarlett sighed as her nose picked up the scent of fresh croissants, and artisan breads. Her mouth began to salivate as she noticed the smartly dressed waiter walk over to her table with her order of a croissant, and smooth, dark, hot chocolate.

She bit into the perfectly light, flaky croissant and made sure to capture every buttery crumb with her tongue. She closed her eyes as she savored the textures, flavors and simple pleasure of truly tasting good food.

She reached for her steaming cup of hot chocolate and took in a deep breath, allowing the rich aroma to wash over her. She blew a little air out of her mouth and then opened her lips to sip the rich, smooth texture of the dark chocolate. Her eyes closed again as she thought of nothing but pure joy.

After her luxurious snack, Scarlett left the outdoor café and sauntered to the town square to decide on a whim, where to visit next.

Instantly her nose led her to a small eatery with fresh basil, rosemary and sage wafting out of it's windows. When she walked in she noticed the fresh cheese, tomatoes and seafood stew the other patrons were devouring. She quickly found a seat and waited for service.

As Scarlett sat there waiting, she said a little prayer of gratitude. She felt so blessed to travel the world in search of the finest, most heart-warming, and flavorful meals. Save the souvenirs and the shopping for the other tourists, all she wanted to do was eat slowly, with great pleasure.

Blog Homework #1

~ Write a page about you. Introduce yourself. Prompt: If you were a character in your own book, what would your name be? Describe your inner self and your outer self. Prompt: "He saw her sneak into the classroom. She was ____, but he could tell she was____. . ."

Assignment #1

Professor Snickety began the class as he always did, peering over his glasses at his students, and smoothing over that lonely swath of hair sitting at the tip of his forehead.

"Today I'd like you to ponder Shakespeare's ability to make even the most despicable characters...."

The door creaked open as Scarlett tried to stealthily sneak into the theater styled lecture room. She tried, but really, it was hard not to notice the echo of the door hinges and the dark, rich colors paired together simply on her average frame.

Her friends in the class knew she physically looked like someone who would hide in the back of the class and never speak up, and perhaps she was in the past, but they smiled knowingly, because Scarlett never let an opinion go unsaid, if she could help it.

They also knew, that though she kept her beauty regimen simple, running around without a dab of makeup except on Sundays, she was quite a complicated, fussy woman when it came to food, learning, and magnifying the talents she didn't think she had.

She was the type of girl who was immediately warm and friendly, but also knew to give space when someone didn't respond with that same warmth. She was very loyal, but destructive when crossed. She would be quite gentle with words in person, but scathing on paper. If there was one thing her friends could count on, it would be her ability to stand true to her values. There was a stubborn streak, a generous heart and an addiction to humor that endeared her to those closest to her.

She loved to make everyone feel comfortable and at ease, but valued having few friends - she'd prefer to have a few loyal, sincere friends than flippantly gather up quantity. In essence she was a mix of contradictions and "if this...then that".

Professor Snickety sighed, as Scarlett was known to always run a bit behind. He then smiled unwillingly, as she dropped off a bag of fresh pears on his desk. Against his will, she had burrowed herself into his amused affection. He waited for her to sit down, cleared his throat, and continued his sentence.

"...could make even the most despicable characters, relate to each reader. Why is it, my dear students, that we often despise those that are most similar to our darkest selves? Turn to your favorite play and create a character analysis of the villain or villains, and discover what traits are similar to yourself."

After a brief comment to her neighbors, creating a giggling fit, the students bowed their heads and began writing.

Why? Because you can.

My trainer Jen is amazing... when she presents us with crazy hard exercises she asks "why? Because you can." It's her positive motivation and placing the responsibility of shaping our bodies on us that I love.

So... because I was browsing my google reader tonight, I saw my friend La Yen's working on this - with the TravelinOma. She saw it on our friend ~J's blog and I noticed my friend CW is working on it too... well.. now I want to do it...because I can. How I will fit it in is a mystery - but it looks like fun!

If you want to join... do it baby. And... if you wouldn't mind referencing me so I get some extra school credit too.

... I am so excited!

In the blink of an eye

Today was a normal day.

I went to cardio and yoga.

Then we had a run-in and disappointment with Stanley Steemer. We told them to go home because they started right off the bat with "I don't guarantee I can get any spots out." Then tried to back-track by saying ... "well, that would be extra". I categorize it all as plain lazy.

My hubby had an errand to run for the upcoming Stake Youth Standards Fireside, and I had some to run for an incoming Beehive we get to kidnap out of Primary on Sunday.

After our errands we went to a local BBQ spot we'd never tried. It was scrump-diddly-upmtious. I love BBQ, pulled pork, BBQ baked beans... mmmm.

On our way home we were blissful.

Then about 0.5 or 0.8 miles from our exit, a small black integra about two, three cars in front of us in the far right lane swerved over to the right towards the drop-off embankment, then sprinted so fast over to the far left lane hitting two SUVs. The second SUV flipped over as the integra then spun out of control back across three lanes into a giant lamp post, which came crashing down in front of us.

I was so shocked I didn't even make a sound.

The integra then dived down the embankment into the field below.

My husband kept our car in control the entire time, while I sat stunned, holding my breath.

Instantly several things happened at once, people streamed out of their cars to help the turned-over SUV driver and the other car. My husband told me to call 911, and quickly went out to see if anyone needed help.

The 911 operator had to tell me to calm down multiple times as I tried to get the information out as fast as possible. I don't know why, but I started feeling emotional... I cry a lot these days.

Soon we saw a young guy (maybe a father) and a little boy, maybe 9-10 yrs climbing out of the embankment from their integra.

Knowing the Firemen were on their way my husband navigated us out of the wreckage. I saw the woman in the toppled, totaled SUV on the side of the road being tended to by passersby... they even had her neck in a brace. There was blood. We said a family prayer and are hoping that everyone is safe.

I can't help but wonder - what happened? Did the guy in the integra over-compensate? Was he not paying attention? (probably) Did a tire blow out?

As we drove away I saw the amount of wreckage strewn across the freeway, and couldn't believe that it only took mere seconds for all of this happen in front of us.

I am so grateful we weren't in this accident. I am so grateful my husband noticed the integra getting squirrely in front of us and backed off the gas. I am so grateful for cell phones that allow us to call for help. I am so grateful for people who see tragedy and jump to aide those in peril.

I am just so grateful my family and I are safe... time to snuggle closer tonight...and remember how in just a blink of an eye how fragile, and fleeting life is.