Monday, May 23, 2011

Anatomy lesson

***If you are easily offended - close your browser and wash your eyes out with soap. Potty words and accurate anatomy names ahead.***

We still get to cotonelle wipe my 4YO's bum after she makes a poopy. I know, I know. It's time she did it herself. I like to think that because I've done it for her this long, when I'm old, and can't reach that area, she'll be willing to help me out like I did for her. 

Hey, don't ruin my dream. On second thoughts, that's a weird dream - please ruin it.

Several Saturdays ago I was downstairs sounding the five-minute mark to get out of the house for the egg hunt when she shouted, "someone wipe me! someone wipe me! someone wipe me!" in a really cute, sing-song kind of a way. Since Daddy was upstairs, and all dressed, mind you, he went to wipe her.

4YO: Daddy, why is your v@gina so big?

Phantom: What are you talking about? I don't have a v@gina.

4YO: Yes, you do. It's right there. *points* in general direction.

Phantom: It's not a v@gina.

4YO: Well, it looks like a big poopy.

My husband relayed the above conversation to me as we waited for our table before brunch. I could not stop laughing. Then we were both reminded of this bit from John Oliver's NY Stand-up show. ***if you are easily offended by the accurate name of the male organ - you won't like this clip***
John Oliver - A Footballer's Penis
JokesJoke of the DayFunny Jokes

ps. We believe in teaching our girls the proper names of our body. Also, nakedness at home is not a big deal here. So yeah, we're part hippie. In case you are a busybody worried about our daughters - we're not complete morons, the girls did not watch this clip. But, you could watch it, and then pretend you didn't, and then become so offended you need to go tattle. Enjoy!

pps. In case you were wondering if I have. No, I haven't - thank goodness - or I can't remember. My husband, has. ...and I guess, so have my daughters.


Erin said...

I'm totally with you on proper names. And kids really do say the funniest things:)

Queen Scarlett said...

They make life so much fun.